It’s not quite a slab of granite,

but maybe Lefalcon will appreciate it nonetheless.

A woman with a bizarre fetish for inaninimate objects has revealed she has been married to the Berlin Wall for 29 years.

Eija-Riitta Berliner-Mauer, 54, whose surname means Berlin Wall in German, wed the concrete structure in 1979 after being diagnosed with a condition called Objectum-Sexuality.

Mrs Berliner-Mauer, whose fetish is said to have its roots in childhood, claimed she fell in love with the structure when she first saw it on television when she was seven.

Click to read more.


  1. lefalcon

     /  July 4, 2008

    Wow: All these yrs Ive been afflicted with something called Objectum-Sexuality and never knew it. Better shove my dick in a drainage pipe to celebrate! (I no longer feel so alone.)

    Fascinating topic. Seriously.

  2. cymast

     /  April 24, 2009

    People can marry walls?

    In any case, I wonder if Objectum-Sexuality is translatable into phone sex? What would a “wall” say?

    I’m a wall.

    Really? You’re really a wall?

    Yep. I’m a wall.

    Oh my god, I’m talking to a wall!

    Yep, a wall.

    Oh yes YES YES!! A wall OH GOD YES!!

  3. acilius

     /  April 25, 2009


    You should devote a line to it. You might be the first!

  4. cymast

     /  April 25, 2009

    Hey I just might. Anything to drum up business in this economy.

  5. acilius

     /  April 25, 2009

    You might have the market all to yourself for a while.

  6. acilius

     /  April 26, 2009

    Of course, the telephone itself might be a formidable competitor.

  7. cymast

     /  April 26, 2009

    Yeah those Objectum-Sexuality people might not even make it to the phone, what with the floor, walls, and furniture all vying for their attention . .

  8. cymast

     /  April 26, 2009

    That coquettish ceiling is playing hard-to-get. Naughty ceiling . . you need a spanking. I’ll just use a step ladder to . .

    Well hello step ladder! I know you have a foot fetish . .

  9. acilius

     /  April 26, 2009

    lol! You should write that up as a comic strip, I visualized a comic strip as I read it.

  10. cymast

     /  April 26, 2009

    I will!

  11. acilius

     /  April 26, 2009

    Terrific, I look forward to it!

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